Stand Up And Be Counted

After months of writing and years of building up the confidence, I finally took the plunge and had a go at stand-up comedy.

I did my first gig at an Open Mic night at The Studio, Hartlepool a couple of weeks ago.  Despite nearly being so nervous I almost threw up a lung, my set went down pretty well - although the audience was largely made up of my friends, so it was an easy-ish introduction to the profession.

On the back of that I was invited to perform at The Studio again last night.  This time though it was with the Big Owl Comedy Club - which meant paying customers, and being sandwiched in between two professional comedians (not in a sexual way, it wasn't that kind of gig).  This, along with deciding not to use my 'cheat sheet' unlike the previous time and relying on memory, brought its own pressures.  This time nerves got the better of me and I forgot two of my best gags.

It seemed like a nightmare in my head from start to finish, but upon watching back the footage I seem to have just about pulled it off.

I took a risk by conquering my fear of public speaking, and it paid off.  Now I've got the stand-up bug.  I've got several more gigs lined up already, and I'm adding new jokes to try and take my set from 8 minutes to around 10.

With a bit of luck, this could take off...

Preview

A Hallmark State Of Mind

Whilst browsing through the racks of a certain low-budget card shop today, I noticed something I have so far been ignorant of - greeting cards for teaching assistants.

Yes, you read that right.

Whilst I can just about live with the cacophony of choices that the greeting cards industry forces upon us, for me this is a bridge too far.  Cards for teachers are bad enough (what's wrong with just saying "thank you"?), but do we really need to express our gratitude for teaching assistants in this way too?  And come to think of it, why do we even need teaching assistants?

I did most of my schooling in the Eighties, with classes of over 40 kids, all presided over by one person.  This person was called Teacher.  Are classrooms so bad now that they need tag-team learning?  Are students so unruly that authority figures have to go in two by two, like a scholastic Noah's Ark?

What's next?  Thank-you cards for paperboys?  Get-well-soon cards for lollipop ladies who get mown down by single mothers on the school run?

Here's an idea: let's just have cards for greeting card shop assistants, and cut out the middleman.  They can give them to each other whilst they're stacking them on the shelves and save the rest us of a lot of time and money.